Be Kind to Your Children

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Posted on: 27 February 2018 by Sam Raynolds

I made a Facebook post the other day. It stated a simple yet truthful fact: if you are not kind to your children, you can’t expect the world to be either.

We as parents carry so much responsibility on our shoulders. It’s hard to ALWAYS be kind to anyone. It’s even harder to always be kind to the toddler screaming in the middle of a store, or the smart-mouthed elementary schooler, the cocky preteen and let’s not forget the pushy, dramatic teenagers.

What we have to remember is this isn’t who they are, or who they are going to be. We have time to help mold and shape them. How we react to them will directly affect how they react to things, even in adulthood.

After making that post, I realized that what I think kindness is may be different than what you think kindness is.

For my family and myself, we are kind of a crazy house full of emo’s. At this point, John and Mason are the only two who rarely react instantly to emotion. The rest of my family lash out instantly, whether we are happy, mad, or sad. You will see these reactions all over our faces. This should also tell you that we don’t always react kindly to certain situations. There have been plenty of times that I have reacted on impulse. This is also a big reason why I choose not to hit my kids. When I react negatively, it’s because I’m angry. I don’t want my children to grow up and not be able to manage their anger. Anger is an acceptable emotion and should be addressed and acknowledged appropriately.

 “Kindness is a language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.” 
― Mark Twain

 

Kindness, in my eyes, is acknowledging when your reaction to something might have hurt someone. Whether you intentionally lashed out or it was pure emotion, just saying you’re sorry and being aware can make a really big difference.

You don’t have to wear the burden of being the perfect, kind parent on your shoulders. Just being conscious and open-minded to your child’s emotions is incredibly important. If you are feeling snappy and your child is uncooperative, you may say or do things you don’t mean, or react in a way you wish you hadn’t. For me, being a gentle parent isn’t always about being gentle, it’s about being aware of my actions and if I make a mistake, knowing that my kids are deserving of an apology. Just as I would wish for them to apologize to me when they hurt my feelings.

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